Saturday, May 29, 2010

Ready for Battle

Today started out so beautifully.  A holiday weekend in sunny California and what could be better!  I love living here.  I love the sunshine and the beaches and will always be a die-hard California girl.  My dermatologist constantly warns me of the dangers sunbathing.  Now, I wear a big floppy hat, huge sunglasses and a t-shirt over my chest!  I like getting my arms and legs tan though and still venture to the beach on a weekly basis.  I feel like nothing is better for my four year old daughter then an hour or two playing in the sun and sea water! wears her out!
It's been extremely difficult keeping my head up.  I made a promise to myself not to write about depressing things and so I won't.  I'll just say this past week has definitely been one of those weeks that 'If it doesn't kill me, It'll make me stronger."  Often I feel I may die soon.  Just when I overcome one obstacle another is thrown in my face.  My faith is huge and I know I will get through.  I just don't know how.
After a beautiful day, tonight another obstacle had been thrown at me.  It's really time that I finish crying and put on my boxing gloves and get ready to fight.  Certain circumstances have made it clear that I need to really buck up and become the gangsta that I am.  I can no longer hang my head and hope that things work out.  They will not.  I must take care of myself and my daughter.  If I don't no one else will.
So I will put on my gloves and get ready for what is sure to be a vicious battle.  Any words of encouragement will be greatly appreciated as I will need every ounce of strength I have.

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