Thursday, December 22, 2011

MATCH.COM - INTERNET DATING???

  I have come to the conclusion I am NOT an internet dater!  I can tell you that it has been worth the $40.00 I paid for one month, just to read the emails, and see pics that are sent my way!  It's endless hours of comic material!
  I jumped on this morning just to check out if I have any new emails.  Here's what one guy instant messaged me at 800am:
Hmmmmidididididseeaputtycat
  Yes, it took me a moment too!  Did he really just write that?  Wait!  How old is this guy?  Oh...He's 49 years old!  Mmmm. No thanks!
  There's more.  I got a 'Happy Hump Day' email.  Yes, some 38 year old guy sent me an email wishing me a 'Happy Hump Day!'
   It gets better!  I've gotten every kind of email from long. life stories, to 'hey you wanna meet'.  Here's the thing;  I can't date anyone that calls himself  'majicstick' or 'cuddly' anything.  Im looking for a date, not a stuffed animal!
  I also cannot date anyone who has that mullet haircut!  I'm sorry fellows, but really????  If your bald, be bald!  DO NOT have a bald head, or partially bald head, and then a long stringy pony tail, or rat tail, whatever you call it, hanging down your neck!  And why does it always look like you grease up the rat tail too?  Like a greasy string stuck to you!  Ladies, you know what I'm talking about!  I mean seriously!  
I also cannot date a man that makes $35,000 and is 49 years old.  If your not making more then $35,000 at 49 then you probably cannot afford me.  Call me a gold digger!  Hahaha, which is really funny!  Yeah, I'm a gold digger because I prefer to live somewhere other then a double wide trailer!
  Lastly, I posted on my profile that I prefer black men.  It's not mandatory, just a preference.  Some people prefer dark hair, dark eyes, some prefer blonde, some prefer big, some prefer skinny.  It's all just a preference.  So, I did state my preference.  Why do I keep getting pictures of men that look like they just stepped off a John Deere Tractor??? AND they live in the boondocks!  Like Riverside or something!  Really??
  Did I mention I like smart guys?  I cannot date someone who cannot spell!  Spelling is a must!  Even if you don't know how to spell there is this thing, called 'spellcheck'. ugh!  Am I being too harsh?
  My profile has been viewed 1913 times.  I have 93 emails and 167 winks.  My first week on Match.com I was so impressed at 48 emails.  uhmmm, I've never really been good at math.  I think percentage wise, I'm not doing so well.  I've seen 3 men that are slightly interesting.  3!  Only 3!  And those 3, we have gone back and forth a couple of times through emails.  One lives in the valley.  Geographically undesirable!  One lives near me, but seems a little shy and not so anxious to post his pic.  That's fine.  We will see.  The other is super hot looking (I'm trying not to be into looks) white guy, lives in L.A.  Another not so geographically fit!  And a third, who was actually the front runner, lives quite far, more then an hour away, but looks healthy, wealthy and wise!
  I will keep everyone posted!  Please follow me on twitter @kurucocktails, or follow me on this site, or leave your comments, or post a reply!

Friday, December 9, 2011

MATCH.COM - ANSWERING EMAILS!

I'm about 2 weeks in, to Match.com.  I see why this is a billion dollar company!  The first week I posted my profile but did not join.  I just casually browsed.  You can do this for free.  Other members that have joined, can send you emails.  The trick is you can't read those emails until you join!  That's how they get you.  You can't even see pics of those that sent you emails unless you join.  The whole thing is a complete tease!  Very ironic!
So after I set up my profile I see that I have a bunch of emails.  They have reeled me in!  I join Match.com and now I am fully committed!  My friends, by the way, are all laughing at me!  They cannot believe 'I wasted' $40.00.  Apparently they feel that this dating service is for those that can't get a date!  I don't feel like this.  I think many busy professionals are just busy.  And let's face it.  If you don't go out to clubs or bars, then what's left?  The coffee shop?  I've met dates there too, and Match.com can't be any worse!
It's a little difficult for me to send an email to someone that looks interesting.  I'm so happy I'm a women!  I don't have to think of anything smart, funny, or original enough to send to a person.  I just post my picture and Bam!  Answering emails is intimidating as well,  if I'm going to be perfectly honest.  Because eventually I know they are going to want to meet!   Uh yea...That's the idea right?  Yea.  I'm not so good at that part!  It's totally putting yourself out there.  Like having blind dates on a regular basis!  
We all have that fear right?  Like, what if this person doesn't like me?  What if he thought I looked different in the picture?  What if he's terrible and I don't like him? How do I turn him down in a nice way? (I don't believe in being mean)  However,  I have discovered that in some cases you have to mean.  Some men just don't get it!
I'm going to start locally.  Probably meet at my favorite coffee shop.  Yes it will be the same coffee shop that I met the other guy I went to lunch with.  The one that was older, very wealthy, and a complete ass!  He still comes in every morning.  I can't believe he hasn't switched coffee shops!  Anyway, that's another story.
I will keep everyone posted!  Please follow me on twitter @kurucocktails.  Or subscribe to this post.  Or repost. Or 'like' on facebook.

Tuesday, December 6, 2011

MATCH.COM- ANSWERING EMAILS

2nd day in and I've decided to actually answer some of these 48 emails.  Not the ones that are ridiculous!  There are many of those!  Can you believe that men actually start with 'Hey Baby.'  Really?  I also cannot believe how many men actually send an email that starts with, "you know you want to meet me?"  Really?  uh..no, not really!  Seriously, I'd say at least five men sent an email that started with, "you know you want to meet me?"  Here's my favorite: 


How are you today love. I like your profile and pictures are up my alley. Check me out and see if you dig me as much as most people do ;). We could meet up for a quick beer at maybe Cook's Corner and see whats up. Nothing formal. So don't fight it, you know you want to meet me. Don't be escared, i'm not. I've dated beautiful women all around the world LOL


I'm not sure if this is a joke!  Did he really just say that?  Cook's corner?  For those of you that don't know Cook's corner is this completely dive breakfast/lunch place that looks like it is serious need of renovation!  I've never been inside and have no idea if the food is good, because.....I'm too scared!  Honestly, it looks like it's been around since the 1800's, needs a fresh coat of pain or something.  Keep in mind I live in Newport Beach California.  Denny's look nicer then this place!  Not an ideal first impression to say the least!  Maybe all those 'beautiful women' from around the world should have clued him in!




My favorite email came from a 39 year old guy.  Probably not my type, but could not have asked for a better email.  Take note men:


Wow! Whats the secret? I would guess that you are 29 years old…keep up the great work! You look fantastic:)


I know the 29 years thing is a bit of a stretch,  but it sounds good right?  Sweet and simple.  No 'hey baby' involved no, 'Google me because I'm the best your gonna get'.  (I got that too!)  None of that!  


Anyway.  I still have emails to go through, so I will keep everyone posted!  Please comment, subscribe, or follow me on twitter @kurucocktails

Monday, December 5, 2011

MATCH.COM FIRST TIME IN!

I finally joined Match.com after posting my profile last week.  I had 48 emails and 7 winks!  That's pretty good right!  I have to admit it was pretty fun to read all the emails and check out what men had to say.  WOW!  Men are sooo funny!  It must be really difficult to be a man.  Seriously.  All I had to do was post a picture.  Men on the other hand,  see the picture and  they have to come up with an opening line.  Something to break the ice, sound original, be funny if possible, and tell me a little about themselves, and do all this in a short and sweet manner-before I get bored!
  You would not believe what men will write!  I've really gotten everything from 'hey baby!'.....(did he really open with that?)  to 'Have you ever been with a younger man?'  to really sweet, funny, articulate messages!  I was quite surprised and very entertained!
Out of 48 emails I will return a couple of them.  'rockhardabs' will not be one of those!  There were actually a couple of guys that sounded kind of interesting.  It did help that they have an airplane (or so they say)  I do have a thing for airplanes!  Before you ask, yes I will only be dating those that have a positive cash flow.  Call me a gold digger, call me whatever you want.  I've dated broke men, I don't plan on doing that ever again.  If your wondering why I am so adamant go ahead and read my previous blogs and you will quickly understand.
Oh yes, and I am so surprised how many men comment that 'I'm sexy'.  How do they know that?  If your a guy and your reading this I'd sure like to know.  I just submitted one picture.  It's not a bikini pic or  risque or half-dressed, or anything like that.  Just a regular picture.  Yet, at least half the men that responded to me had the word 'sexy' in their response.  I find that interesting.
I don't know when the next time I will log on will be, but I will definitely keep you posted!

Sunday, December 4, 2011

Match.com-The Profile!

So, as previously stated I have decided to join Match.com.  It should be a very interesting journey.  I encourage those who are considering the same, to follow me and see how it goes!  This will be an honest, open, and often humorous blog!  Some may not appreciate my sense of humor!  I can already see that coming!  I cannot write about this without calling it as I see it,  so here goes:

I have had many discussions with friends about this before I actually did it.  Everyone, and I mean EVERYONE I have spoken to has said this is  a 'must do'!  I heard everything from, "I met my husband on Match.com" to, "only losers go to the internet for dating".  Seriously, I am NOT an internet dater! I have never one this nor considered doing anything like this.  First and foremost, I don't believe what people write.  I am suspicious by nature.  Thus my dilemma.  I'm suspicious anyway, and prefer to wait and see what a man does, rather then what he says.

You can 'browse for free'.  I got on Match and decided to 'browse.'  That act alone is worth a couple of hours of laughter!  I mean seriously...if you set up a profile name of 'softkisser' or 'bestkisser' or 'bizzle' or 'boytoy' or 'ImaKING', I really can't read much further.
I especially love the photos of men that look like prison photos.  You know the kind with the pastel paint in the background and he's wearing a plain white tee.  Don't ask me how I know this...I just do.  Or even better, when they REALLY look like they are or have been recently been released from a crazy institution.  What are these guys thinking?  All bug eyed trying to catch a women.  It's really quite funny.  If you want some good free entertainment, just go 'browse' for a minute!
To set the record straight, the above comments are not to say that I look better then anyone else.  Or to make fun of those not so attractive.  I truly believe there is someone for everyone so that is not what I'm talking about.  I'm really talking about people that post their pictures and really do LOOK crazy!
So I browsed through the photos.  Out of about 100 pics I found one guy that I thought looked & sounded interesting.  I don't date men based on looks.  Been there, done that.  Fine men are often the dumbest!
Match.com asks a lot of questions.. Mostly stupid ones.  Like, what kind of animals do you like-and then they list, dog, cat, bird, fish...I mean who really cares if I will like your pet fish???
Most of the answers are standard, 'I like long walks on the beach'...occasionally a guy will be pretty funny.  This means nothing.  Just because they can write funny, doesn't mean they are!
I took the time to fill out my profile and then posted it!  YIKES!  That was last week.  I did not join match.com.  I'm the kind of person that really likes to weigh the pro's and cons before I actually partake.  So I posted my profile and a week later I see that I have 41 emails!  41!  That's good right?  I mean if you look at the odds, I haven't had 41 guys ask me out this week!  So before I even read the emails, which I can't do unless I join-that's how they get you.  I wanted to post my original perception of the browsing thing.  Honestly, I am interested in seeing who and what kind of men have emailed me.  So please subscribe or follow me on twitter or just keep reading to see what happens!