I have posted before that it has been a particularly challenging year for me. My son is very ill and has been in and out of the hospital a half a dozen times this past year. He doesn't just go into the hospital either. It usually requires an ambulance, police, crisis team, etc etc.
I have a young daughter too, along with other kids, and keeping my own mental stability is a task in itself. It's difficult to keep things 'normal' when you have a child that is sick. I am constantly having to remind myself that I have a child that IS NOT sick.
There are also other problems that life brings. I don't make enough money to support my family. Stuck in a job I really don't like. I don't have anyone to help me. Bills. blah blah blah
However, this post is not a complaint. This post is about gratitude and how thankful I really feel. Through this most difficult year ever, I have grown to have a relationship with God. I have always had what I thought was a relationship, but now I know the difference. Through this difficult year I have watched miracles happen before my very eyes. I have stayed up all night, praying to God, and in the morning had that very prayer answered. I have literally watched miracle after miracle happen.
I could give some examples: My one son was coming home form the Army, My other son is sick, I have a daughter as I said, and I drive a Smart car! Uhmmm...Love the Smart car, but definitely not enough room for all the kids. It was never an issue before, because It was just me and my daughter. But with all three kids around for the holidays, now it's an issue. So I prayed about it. "God, I don't know how this is going to work out, but I need a car that can fit everyone." and I just kept praying and trusted that it would work out. Guess what? Someone gave me a car! No really! GAVE it to me! And its not a junker either! It's a really nice Hyundai. seriously. Now, the pessimist might say, oh well, a family member gave it to you, it wasn't God. But I don't believe that.
Another example: My son went missing for several days. Literally missing. Missing like, I made flyers and drove around to Laguna Beach and Huntington Beach and handed out flyers and put them on posts, and asked everyone (including cops) if they had seen him. It physically made me ill. I can't tell you how many hours/days I spent looking. It had been almost two weeks. I hadn't slept at all. So I stayed up one night all night and asked God to just please return my son to me so that I would know he was safe. The NEXT morning, my son walked in the door. I have no idea how he even made it to my house. He had no money. Not one dime. He just appeared!
There are so many other things that have happened. Today, I start my day off, on my knees, with a prayer. The bible says to start prayer off asking for forgiveness. I try to stick to that. Then I prayer for what I want, because I believe my God wants me to live an abundant life full of happiness and joy. Today I have that. I still have problems, but they don't look so big anymore. I feel as though God as with me and that is beautiful